Sunday, March 6, 2011

Please Join Us For Our Next Pirate Adventure Cruise!

Are you tired of the same old vacation routine? Are you ready to take the vacation experience to a whole new level? If so, then this trip is defiantly for you.



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L u x u r y    C r u i s e    L i n e s
Now Accepting Reservations! Additional cruise information available below.


 
To-The-Point Cruise Lines is excited to offer the ultimate adventure cruise, along the pirate-infested coast of Somalia !


 
Ultimate Adventure Cruise Route
Rates and Availability
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Ship Name
Starting Price
Days
Availability
Sun Splendor
$5,200.00
5
Fully Booked
Grand Voyage
$6,150.00
7
Reservations Available
Horizons IV
$7,091.00
10
Reservations Available
Horizons III
$5,200.00
7
Fully Booked
Grand Voyage II
$6,300.00
7
Fully Booked
Grand Voyage III
$5,200.00
5
Reservations Available
Coastal  Paradise
$5,200.00
7
Reservations Available
Coastal  Paradise II
$8,200.00
10
Reservations Available
Peril Princess
$5,200.00
7
Fully Booked
Peril Princess II
$5,200.00
7
Reservations Available
  We board our luxury cruise ships in Djibouti on the Gulf of Aden near the entrance to the Red Sea and disembark in Mombassa Kenya seven adrenaline-charged days later.
Reservations start at only $5,200 per-person (double occupancy, inside room) and $6,900 (verandah complete with bench rest).


 
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You'll relax like never before!
That's because you are welcome to bring your own arsenal with you.
If you don't have your own weapons, you can rent them from our onboard Master Gunsmith.
Enjoy reloading parties every afternoon, with skeet and marksmanship competitions every night!


But the best fun of all, of course, is...


 
...Pirate Target Practice!
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The object of our cruise is to sail up and down the Somali Coast waiting to get hijacked by pirates!


 
Weapon Selection
Price
Description
AK-47 Light Assaultcid:DB13D60846FB44149F52747CF1F6C3C2@MikePC
$12.00
Per Day
On a budget? Rent a full-auto scope-mounted AK-47 for only $9/day
7.62 ball ammo at $12 per 100 rounds.
M-16 Full Automaticcid:4942D4BA61BA41FDA3EEAA9F4769F274@MikePC
$25.00
Per Day
Rent a full auto M-16 for only $25/day with ammo
attractively priced at $16 per 100 rounds of 5.56 armor-piercing:
Barrett M-107 50 Calibercid:33CB8454D67A448B8564F6A05E66C40D@MikePC
$59.00
Per Day
Hello! Nothing gets a pirate's attention like a Barrett M-107 50-cal rifle; only $59/day with 25 rounds of armor-piercing ammo
affordably priced at only $29.95.
RPG Launchercid:2E6D2083BDA54923BE1E916F67CB588A@MikePC
$175.00
Per Day
Want to make a real impact? Rent an RPG for only $175/day
with three fragmentation rounds included!
A true favorite among pirates, rent one today and show you care!


 
Customer Testimonials
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"Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my wife nailed two,
Also, our 12-year old son sank two boats with the mini-gun.
This wonderful cruise was fun for the whole family"
-- Fred D., Cincinnati, OH
"Pirates 0, Passengers 32! Well worth the trip! Can't recommend it highly enough!" -- Ben L., Bethesda , MD
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!Twin mounted mini-guns are available for rental at only $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire!
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Additional Cruise Line Services
  • Need a spotter? Our professional crew members can double as spotters for only $30/hour. Spotting scope included, but gratuities are not.
  • Also included: Free complimentary night vision equipment - and throughout the night, coffee, pastries and snacks are always available on the main deck from 7pm until 6am
  • Our deluxe package comes complete with gourmet meals and all rooms offer a mini-bar.


 
OUR SATISFACTION GUARANTEE!


 
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We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or you'll receive an instant $1,000 refund upon arrival in Mombassa!.

How can we make that guarantee? Because we operate at 5 knots, just beyond 12 nautical miles off the coast of Somalia, in international waters where pirates have no rights whatsoever!

In fact, we make three passes through the area's most treacherous waters to ensure maximum visibility by Somali mother ships. We repeat this for five days, making three complete passes along the entire Somali Coast . At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off every five minutes, with loud disco music blasted toward the shore line to attract maximum attention.


 
ACT NOW!
Cabin space is limited, so you need to respond quickly. Reserve your package before December 31st and get a great bonus - 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice! So sign up for the Ultimate Somali Coast Adventure Cruise now!


 
BUT THERE'S EVEN MORE!

 
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Reserve Now -and be automatically entered to win a  5 minute time slot on the Captain's own Twin Browning 50 Caliber M2HB installation!

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in 'Nam. Don't worry about getting shot by pirates. They never even get close to the ship with the crap they shoot and their lousy aim! Come on board and bag your own bunch of genuine Somali pirates!"

 Why don’t we all book a date on this cruise.  Looks like fun to me.  I will even give the pirates a sporting chance by just using a little AR-15.